What seems to be the problem with Mr. Justin Timberlake these days? Not even his girlfriend Jessica Biel could cheer up the poor lad.

Justin is maybe wondering where his former love Cameron Diaz has gone too. Maybe Justin is getting a bit tired and scared of waking up to his buffer arm girlfriend Biel and reminds him his own girlfriend has better buffer arms than him…kinda freaky, I know. Justin is yearning his girly girl Miss Cameron Diaz by his side. Jessica is thinking her boyfriend is quite an emotional basket case who spends more on his hair than he does on her.

Apparently it is very clear who wears the pants in this awkward relationship duo..no other than Biel. She is ranking in the big cheddar with the car keys in her hand, nice car we night add. Hope somone doesn’t start to get a bit jealous over her in charge ways and pay checks lately. You might have to start wearing long sleeve shirts to cover your guns of arms missy, for Justin’s sake.

Heidi and Spencer are back again at the Pepsi 500 just doing the thing that they do best…creep all of us out!

Spencer as usual is all smiles for the cameras while Miss Heidi Montag is unusually no smile but instead a rather stern glare. Maybe she has a lot of important matters on that small mind of hers, such as who can really represent John McCain’s Republican Convention if she can’t not make it..what ever will John McCain do, without Heidi Montag? Or maybe it is even a bigger deeper issue than that, maybe perhaps it is Spencer’s ever growing gut that is making Heidi not smile anymore.

I think Spencer Pratt needs to get a real job ad stop drinking all those beers and sodas while on the couch watching tv all day, as what we see on The Hills. This has really take a toll on Heidi that she now can’t tell what a good real purse should look like. YIKES!!

Wait is that Miss Paris Hilton…oops no it is not…it is Paris’s developing little sister Carrie Underwood who is slowly turning into a look a like of the Hilton Heiress.

Carrie, sweet small town gal, is now Hollywood’s version of what sweet is suppose to look like. Starting with her roots on down, The former American Idol contestant has shed her real down to earth image, and has embark on fake hair to her fake smile. All she is missing in this picture is a matching little dog by her side in a dog purse. She has also shed enough pounds to be thin enough to finally fit in with rest of Tinsel Town’s thin squad.

The money Carrie Underwood has brought in has surely made her be able to afford the bling bling but apparently not enough money to afford just a good hair dye job. If Carrie went any more blonder she would disappear in her own fakeness of beauty. The best part is her feeling it is necessary to “appear” she is actually talking to someone on her phone, so sad. It is quite pathetic to see such a young lady with a big voice with such a small brain to worry only about appearances..please Miss Carrie…get over yourself and over your new found wealth in fakeness.

Miley Cyrus really needs to stop “just being Miley”, as she sings in one of her songs. Bering herself has gotten her into countless troubles, and she can’t help but always be taking pictures of herself…not nice girl pictures either mind you.

Even when having a mother daughter day of shopping, Miley is distracted by her cell phone. She can’t help but to show her mother Tish Cyrus, her new bikini pictures with her random boys and girls she goes around in Hollywood with. How proud must Tish feel, thinking to herself, ” There is my daughter, showing the world what a mixed up 15 year old she really is. I am such a proud mother and awesome parent”. Surely, Miley’s mom tries hard to be the cool hip mom, with her tattoo on her hand..who knows maybe her and Miley are on their way to the tattoo parlor to get matching tattoos together..how sweet. Being 15 and shopping on Rodeo Drive, is a hard day for anyone to deal with.

That is why you gotta take a break from the hard work of shopping and snap some more pictures of guess who….yourself, right Miley? Hope this time you remember to keep the clothes on and out of the bathtub with your friends. But we do feel for Miley, being only 15 and worth millions is not an easy life..thats why you got her mom there to make sure she is spending the money the right way, by buying overpirce trashy clothes.

Hand in hand, side by side, step forward together…love is in the air..can’t you feel it? Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson have broughton love back in the Hollywood town. A once Disney and A-list actress is now turning into a rather confused young woman who looks like she is so close of grabbing a bottle of tequila and chugging it all. Who can blame her when she realizes she is holding hands with a woman who is too cool to ever take off the black shades. Earth to Mr. Ronson, go to Foot Locker and buy yourself some real manly shoes..no girly sneakers allowed.

The sun isn’t even out, but to Samantha Ronson that doesn’t matter because she is simply just too cool to show her pupils to the outside world.  Lindsay’s long locks of tangle washed out hair, with the nastiest dead ends is very becoming of her future career. So sad to see she has to take roles that represent her own real life. Trailer park trash look is so in for Lindsay, it suits her very nicely.

Just worried she will start to bring Samantha down to her level..this is not a good sign..get out now Samantha while you still can..you can always find your dream man..oops…I meant your dream woman..or heck who knows..her dream he/she man. One thing is clear, Lindsay Lohan has never looked more confused in her life..except for the time she found out people really could stand her singing voice..and actually bought her music album..I know Lindsay, it confuses us just as much.

Ok it is official, Miss Tyra Banks has gone looking like a man now. She no longer looks like supermodel Victoria Secret’s supermodel, but instead a washed up over exposed old woman headed into manhood. Her face has changed into almost like Shrek.

Her bad attitude is shown clearly with her hands on her widening hips, mind you she is not “fat” as Tyra would say about herself. Tyra is always so busy talking about herself maybe she doesn’t have the time to take a honest look in the mirror and see she is turning into Shrek’s cousin. Plus she seems to be sporting a new of having no shoes…barefoot to be exact..oops wait she is wearing shoes but you can barely seem them with her extra long black saggy pants. Tyra is probably wearing all black so she can look slimmer and hide those hippo hips of hers.

Seriously, who does she think she is, all the time saying… ” I’m such a “real” woman”? Umm no, please don’t call yourself a real woman, that is an insult to us all. Real women don’t have attitudes the size of her butt nor do they resemble Mr. Shrek. Hope she keeps her day job talking away, because no “real” job would listen to her endless mouth.

p.s. Baby phat isn’t so cute on you missy, Miss Banks

Why is that a cigarette burn Miss Spears is showing on her under wrist? It would not be too surprising if it is because lately these days Miss Spears is full of whacko jacko surprises.

She is now starting to actually return to human form…slowly, very slowly, but still she is a work in progress. In case though Britney does fall of her wagon…again…she seems to be in check with her pager to the nearest mental hospital. Have no fear Brit, the mental ward is here to save you if you fall from grace..once again. Of course, one place hopefully Spears is staying out of is that of the sun. While still only in her mid twenties, she is already starting to show aging skin and those yucky sun spots. With the rate of her smoking and sun exposure, she is sure to age a merely 20 years ahead of time.

Brit please do yourself a favor, and instead of lying out in the sun, try to practice putting on make up better. Nothing is scarier than seeing her in a “I’m going to kill”  scary clown lipstick color. Britney has scared us enough in the past, and this over the top lipstick is scary enough for her kids to be taken away from her forever..oops she does it again..mistake after mistake…will she ever stop ooopsing it?

It truly now is official, Mischa Barton’s career has sunk to an all new low. A low that is so low, that she can never return from it. Once being seen in those horrible nauseating pink sweat pants, she can never recover from something like that. Her “assets” on display in the back, surely have grown in size as well. Just too bad the rating of The O.C. didn’t grow in size as Mischa’s bottom.

And who is this Mr. shorty fellow by her side. Well if it isn’t Ryan from the O.C….oh oops, that isn’t Ben McKenzie, it is just another short man in Mischa’s life. He must be thinking, boy she is one big giant, a big giant with a lot of money to spend.

Actually Mr. Shorty hold that thought of yours because it appears Mischa Barton is now wearing $5 Walmart sweat pants, and her credit card is not good anywhere because she has no money left. See what happens to a young starlet when you get killed off a hit T.V, show….what happens is her career and lifestyle of which she knew, gets killed off too.Maybe Mr. Shorty will wake up and smell the o.c. roses, his giant isn’t going anywhere up but instead just getting larger in certain areas that do not need any more storage..wink wink.

Lookout Jessica Biel but Justin Timberlake, your significant other just shot you a crazed looney man face. Boy that is one ugly scare face Justin is pulling off. Maybe that is how he looks whenever he starts missing his old NSYNC days sweetheart, Britney Spears.

The very thought of him thinking about her is just to destrucitve and crazy to handle, he literally turns into a crazy man just the near thought of Britney, at anytime. Jessica is scarred straight by her boyfriend Justin’s face. Boy when he gets crazy, he is no longer a cutie, but looks like he is two steps away from becoming the next Micheal Jackson.

Jessica knows what a weirdo Justin really is. Only a true weirdo would ever date Miss Spears, and continue to miss her to this day. Jessica is probably thinking, what am I doing with this weirdo, who tried to act “ghetto” but he really sounds like a little girl when he sings…isn’t that weird alone. The rest of the world has always known Justin Timberlake is a bit weird but now he is starting to show his true colors. Run Jessica, run now before it is too late for you.

Don’t turn into a Britney Spears number two! Maybe if you give Timbaland a call, he will set Justin straight about forgetting Britney and trying to pretend to everyone that Justin was normal always….yeah…maybe it was the blonde highlighted girly curls back then, that was the red flag of more oddness to come from Mr. Timberlake?

Jessica would try to get away from Justin’s loose marbles, but with his sweaty tight firm grip hands, how can she go?

Hold your horses Miss Hudgens, you are still tied in with Disney’s High School Musical, so don’t go off the deep end too much now. We all know she is going through her little rebellious stage in the little career she has, but this new look is downright awful.

Vanessa looks like she hasn’t showered in days or wash her droopy hippie locks of hair. Her hippie look hopefully doesn’t go along with her personal hygiene, but from the looks of it, it looks as though her cleanliness has gone out the window. Is she even using a shopping bag as a purse!? Or is that ugly big bag, really a purse with empty shopping bag along the side to give a more “real” tone to her new look. either way she is so mismatched, it is painful on the eyes to bare to look at.

Please for everyone’s sake, please keep the sunglasses on. She is not wearing any make up, and that could really cause some teenager fans to faint. Vanessa, remember if your feeling rebellious and “free” again, stick to your photo taking skills of yourself, they shoudl give you a career boost for at least 5 mintues of fame, once again.